Spartan Stadion Notre Dame, 7/9/22 South Bend, IN
Weather: 70 degrees, sunny
Terrain: Stadium stairs/ramps, sidewalks
Garmin Data (from Wes's GPS): 3.42 miles, elevation gain 383'
Wes talked me into it. Not doing the Notre Dame Stadion, which I would have chosen to do anyway (as a matter of principle, I tend to do any race within driving distance), but rather doing AGE GROUP. This is not something I had ever considered doing, as I loathe burpees and they don't agree with my collarbone, but Wes pointed out that "at a Stadion we only have to do 15." I cannot argue with that logic. Also I have
run clean at a Stadion before so ideally I wouldn't have to do any penalty burpees...right?
Arrived at 6:45 AM to a fairly long check-in line. Thankfully it moved fairly quickly, as did the bag search we all had to undergo before entering the hallowed concourses of Whatever Notre Dame's Football Stadium Is Officially Called. Let me say here, right off the bat, that IDGAF about Notre Dame football either way, god bless 'em. My husband, however, HAAAAATES Notre Dame with the fire of a thousand suns. I once asked him if he hated them more than the New England Patriots, and without hesitation he said "YES." This is a big deal, y'all. Thankfully my husband was not here, because he would have been scowling in the general direction of every single "we're the greatest" type of banner on display. I bet the only way to get him to do a Stadion race with me is if there was one held at Ohio State.
Anyway, Wes and I donned our red headbands and I checked my bag before we entered the start corral. Turns out Age Group runs similarly to Open, wherein waves of 15 random folks just get sent off every 90 seconds or so. No effort made to have the men start together, or the women, since there were too many folks in Age Group and we'd just go by chip timing. And Stadions can't do mass starts because the path is way too narrow. We got going shortly after 8 AM and immediately took off up the ramps to a 4' overwall, then continued to the top and Pipe Lair. Then came our first stair section, which was a pleasure. Notre Dame Stadium (whatever it's called) has bleacher seating, which is very easy to navigate. No banging your knee into a cup holder by accident. Plus it's easy to pass people, or so I assume, since a lot of folks were able to pass me just fine by leaping down or up to a different row looking like Tom Cruise in Every Tom Cruise Movie Ever.
Imagine trying to watch a football game from this angle.
We came upon the heavy jump ropes, where I saw a guy doing them without the provided elastic band around his feet. I asked the nearby volunteer/course marshal if we were supposed to bind our feet and he said yes. So why did he let this guy not band his feet? Bullshit, dawg. So I bound my feet and did my 15 jumps, then continued on some more stairs and down to the multi-rig, which was visible in the concourse so I'd already seen it was rings only. Easy clear. A water stop was just past it and I got a drink, then we went upstairs and through the only paracord crawl on the course, which thankfully went UP the stairs instead of DOWN. Much easier that way!
After the cords was an easy 6' wall, then a long section through the bleachers. We'd go up stairs, then run along that aisle for a long time, then wind down and come back. It was fun and not terribly strenuous, but it had been about 1.5 miles at this point and I was already getting tired, so I walked a good amount. Finally we came down onto the turf field for a three-obstacle gauntlet. First was monkey bars, which were a good challenge. The bars were dry but there were a lot of larger gaps and I had to be careful, but I made it.
"Don't fall, bitch." -my inner saboteur
The second obstacle of the gauntlet was rope climb. I'd made a special little belt to wear my gloves just for this one. It was super easy to grip the rope to get up, then just slide back down to Earth without ripping all my skin off. Worth it. Last obstacle on the field was a 7' wall, which I got up and over in the usual way.
Like a lanky greyhound coming in through the cat door.
Back to stairs and a water station, then the jerry can carry. In the past, these were actual plastic containers of water, which were always slippery and had to be chest-cradled. Now they have replaced those with these sort of kettlebell-looking containers that have soft sides and handles. Men carry two like a farmer's carry, and women carry one. Honestly, carrying two might be less awkward, as you can either hug the thing or you can carry it like the world's heaviest purse. Thankfully we only had to go down and up one level before returning to the start, which was in a giant puddle from leaky containers. (And I didn't know this at the time, but these were the last stairs we would have to climb for the race!)
Now that our feet were wet, it's the perfect time to do the Z-wall! This went well (because I made damn sure I wouldn't fall off) and I rang the bell. Then I took off jogging because it was Downhill Ramp Time! Oh yeah, baby! My favorite part of any Stadion race. Jog down the ramp, grab the handrail to make a quick turn, then continue. Repeat. Repeat again. Oh, it was LOVELY, gal. We went down, down, did some ball slams (20 lb for women, 30 for men), down, all the way to the bottom level, where hand-release push-ups awaited us. I actually got up onto my toes for these instead of my knees, because I had read the rulebook and that was specified. Then we got to go through the visitors' locker room, which was nice. Lots of giant flat-screen TVs mounted everywhere.
A few hallways took us outside on the north side of the stadium, where we had a herc hoist (easy, I didn't even bother with my gloves), then a short jog to a water stop and the spear throw. I knew this was the last potential fail for the day, but I also saw that this spear throw, like every Stadion spear throw, was very short (at least five feet less distance to throw than any other race type). I took a breath, threw it, and it stuck. HELL YES. I high-fived the bemused dude behind me and went up and over the nearby A-frame cargo net, then on to a sandbag carry which hilariously just went about 0.2 miles around a pancake-flat courtyard.
"No stairway? Denied!"
Returned the sandbag, then went over to our last outside obstacle, the Atlas carry. I like Stadion Atlas carries because they use a lovely soft rubber ball (clearly labeled as 70 pounds for women) instead of a terrible concrete monstrosity. They made us pick up the ball, walk across a line of caution tape that they'd strung an ankle-tripping six inches off the ground, then return the ball back to start. After that it was through the tunnel back onto the field for the finishing obstacles. Box jumps were first, which are tough. I actually box-jumped the first 8 or so, then switched to step-ups (which, according to the rules, are allowed, but you have to lock out your knees and hips. Guess how many folks were actually doing that). Then was my least anticipated obstacle of the day: weighted burpees. Do 15 burpees while holding a rubberized tube that weighs 33 lb (55 for men). I grab the damn tube and start doing the burpees, when I notice a guy with an ENORMOUS video camera standing right in front of me filming me. Well shit, now I gotta make these LOOK GOOD, because I have no idea where this video might end up. [I was told later that the camera was for the FUCKING JUMBOTRON, y'all. I was on the JUMBOTRON!] I managed to look fairly solid for the first ten reps, then I got a bit gaspy. The guy stayed and kept filming. I'm actually grateful, since it really did force me to hurry the hell up and not look like a total wuss out there. But I've never been so glad to chuck a rubber tube at the ground and run away before.
Through the punching-bag gauntlet and over the finish line. My goal was under an hour, and I was just under 1:04, but I didn't feel bad. The course was longer than a usual Stadion - most are about 3 miles, and this was closer to 3.5. My pace was great, and I failed nothing. Overall a smashing success.
Plus it was easy to find my light.
FitAid, water, and bananas were at the finish, along with the shirt. Which is ugly. Whatever graphic designer they hired for the shirts this year is truly terrible. These are the most poorly designed finisher shirts of any race I have ever done. Ever. EVER. Truly unwearable. But it was a great race and I had a blast. Now when my husband talks shit about Notre Dame I can say "at least their stadium is fun to do monkey bars in."
Pros:
-Was a bit long, giving more bang for the buck, but then again it meant a PR wasn't possible.
-Course layout was great. I loved that we didn't have to go "up" really at all in the last mile or more.
Cons:
-Apparently there was some cheating going on. People shouldn't be able to get away with cheating obstacles or skipping their Age Group burpees right in front of course marshals and volunteers.
-Finisher shirts this year are FUGLY.
Race Grade: A. Lots of fun, a good challenge.
