Race Recap: Spartan Sprint Ohio

Spartan Sprint Ohio 6/3/18 Garrettsville, OH

Weather: 70s, sunny

Trails: Off-road recreation track - sand, mud, some water. Mostly flat with small hills.

Distance: 4.25 miles, 21 obstacles

This race was conveniently located near the Ohio Turnpike while we were conveniently on our way back home from a week in Pittsburgh, so this race fit nicely into my schedule. Arrived at 9:15 AM for my 10:30 wave start. Parking and check-in went very smoothly. I could probably have cut it a bit closer for my arrival time but why stress? There were a lot of obstacles visible to spectators because the course layout put a ton of stuff in the final mile. We passed the time watching people emerge muddy and soaked from under the dunk wall, which thrilled my toddler. At 10:20 I got into my corral and off we went right on time 10 minutes later!

Hopped over a 4-foot wall easily and ran through the muddy woods for a while. We finally came out into a field and did O-U-T only there was no "under" component, just over and through. From there was more running, a vertical cargo net (about 15-20 feet high, I'd guess), then more running before an inverted wall (which, being tall, I was able to grab the top of and walk myself up the rungs...shorter people would have more trouble). We also ran through a pond of some sort, which was murky enough that you couldn't see the bottom and some of the steps were "doozies," as my grandmother would say if she were not currently dead. It was around this moment when I realized that my new Reebok shoes (which are fairly minimalist) drain really well. It basically felt like I was barefoot. This was quite pleasing because that is exactly why I chose these shoes for this sprint event.

At this point we reached the 2-mile marker. That's right, only 4 obstacles in the first 2 miles. I was at a solid 12-minute mile pace. Then we hit the sandbag carry. I couldn't see exactly how far this was, but I picked up my ladies' sandbag and immediately was like OOF. "How heavy is this?" I asked the volunteer. "It's supposed to be 40 lb" he said. I'm smelling bullshit, and for once it's not the vague manure smell on the muddy trails. I had serious trouble getting this allegedly 40-lb bag onto my shoulder, but I wrestled it up there and made it up a super steep hill about 3-4 stories high and SO STEEP that if you stepped in the wrong place you would slip and fall. At the top of the hill I readjusted my sandbag to the other shoulder and was having a hell of a time with it. I realized this bag is NOT 40 lb. Not even close. (Spoiler alert: a men's sandbag ended up mixed in with the women's bags. This was, in fact, an 80-lb sandbag, which is half my body weight.) Went down the steep hill, which was rough. Tip: don't walk on any gravel. A photographer was at the bottom hidden in a shady spot. I saw him just in time to get ONE smiling picture. Back up and down the hill I went with my giant bag before we could finally drop it back off. This was at least 1/3 mile and took me a good 10 minutes. Brutal.

This picture is next to "brutal" in the dictionary.

Jogged right over to the spear throw and failed the heck out of it. I decided to take advantage of the low crowds and practice doing another throw every 10 burpees. I managed to hit the hay bale each time but it wasn't in position to stick. Got good tips from the volunteer that I will have to try next week (Spartan Sprint Minneapolis)! Next up was the 7-foot wall, and while I had gotten over a 6-foot wall solo in the festival area (they had an opportunity to practice a 6' wall and a rope climb, the rope climb went poorly), I needed the help of a very kind middle-aged man to haul my left foot up to the top. Bless that man! Afterwards it was a short jaunt to the Herc Hoist, which I did with minimal problems.

After the Herc Hoist was another sandy, muddy run to Twister, which I attempted to do sideways. Hey, I don't know any better. I got about 1/3 of the way across before I realized that this was not going to work. Live and learn. I will try it backwards next time. Did my burpees and carried on. But at this point I was realizing that I wasn't really recovering from the burpees at all. My heart rate was over 170 and wasn't coming back. My assumption is that I hadn't had enough electrolytes and carbs that day or the day before, so that's my fault. I had to walk a lot more of the last couple miles, and between that and the burpees and the increasing obstacle load per mile, my pace was going down the toilet really fast. All told, my third mile was 40 minutes, after my first two miles had been 12 minutes each. Another run (well, walk) through the muck and we arrived back near the start line and the energetic crowd of spectators to find the rope climb, which I didn't even try. Nope. Not today, Satan. I knew I'd fail and I didn't want to tear my hands up, so straight to 30 burpees and I was joined by a gal about my age who fell off her rope. We were like "is it just me or is this race, like, crazy hard?!"

Easy obstacle up next: the A-frame cargo net. Easy up and down, then into the first of two barbed wire crawls. These were about 40-50 yards long and felt like they went on forever. They were low enough to require either snake crawling or rolling, and I can't roll because I get tremendously dizzy, so snake crawl it was, over recently cut vegetation that was quite prickly. I AM MIDDLE-AGED. My husband got some pictures of that misery, at least, and my son was just adorable and I didn't want to look like a wuss in front of him. Next was Olympus, which I'd instructed my husband to videotape, and thank god he screwed up the camera because it was a quick and epic fail. Thirty burpees, with my toddler trying to come onto the course and "race with Mama" the whole time. By the time he's 6 years old, he will be better at this stuff than me, guaranteed.

Away from the spectators now and through Rolling Mud, where I got so many quarter-size rocks in my Reeboks that I had to actually stop and empty them. I can ignore tiny rocks, but not big ones. Another run through sandy and muddy woods and we were in a huge field. Bucket carry! I picked that bad boy up (this was definitely a female bucket!) and got to stepping. About halfway through I turned it upside down to hold it by the much-rounder lid, which helped. After what felt like an eternity (probably only 1/4 mile) I put down the bucket and started the second barbed wire crawl, which had fewer stalks of vegetation and more rocks. My knees and arms developed a TON of bruises from this garbage. Then coming up from under the last wire, I pulled my left groin. GO FIGURE. Limped the next few obstacles.

The Armer, basically the Atlas carry but with a small chain on a weighted ball, was next. Out and back around a pole, total of about 20 yards. Easy, the ball didn't weigh much, maybe 40-50 lb. After that was my most anticipated obstacle: the multi-rig! More like the uni-rig, since it only had rings. I'd recently learned how to do these and went out there and crushed it. Husband got great video of it, thank goodness. 

Finally, an easy grip obstacle.

After that was the dunk wall, then an extremely muddy slip wall that everyone seemed to be falling on. Good gravy. I realized I had to keep my feet as high as possible on the wall, and try to ignore that the rope itself was so muddy it was hard to grip. The hardest part was the transition at the top from walking up the wall to holding the top of the wall securely. I managed to do this all by myself, which I was tremendously proud of. I slung that pulled-groin leg over the wall by the grace of god and climbed down the back of the wall to the fire jump and finish!

"Is my life insurance up to date?"

After the finish they immediately put a medal around my neck and started handing me drinks and food. I was like ".....I AM LITERALLY ENCRUSTED IN WET MUD." I asked a volunteer to just pour the water cup she was offering me to drink on my hands so I could wash up enough to hold my stuff. They were giving away free reusable grocery bags at the festival, they should have handed those to us at the end of the race to carry our food/drinks/t-shirts. This is my only complaint about the organization of the race. Well, that and that when I went to hose off in the cold wash area, the walkway leading to it was totally flooded, so I couldn't get my feet clean. We had to walk through giant mud puddles back to the festival anyway. But overall, it was a lovely race and a great challenge, with 4 obstacle failures (all on difficult obstacles).

Freshly gross, or grossly fresh?

Pros:

-Organization. This was a well-oiled machine of an event, at least from my perspective. 

-Photos. Not only did I get great pics on all the obstacle spots, there was a roaming photographer at the festival who got not one, not two, but THREE amazing pictures of my adorable son.

-Spartan obstacles. They are great. Challenging and diverse, for the most part.

Cons:

-Two barbed wire crawls? Come on, mix it up a bit more.

-Some bastard got a men's sandbag into the women's sandbag box and I got screwed by it!

-Give us something to carry the finishing stuff, we are so filthy and it is not cute.

Race Grade: A-. Only a couple "hiccups" in an overall excellent event.